i am officially a terrible cook!!!

[tinseltoes]

im an abismal cook!!- in my mind i was going to cook home made burgers with sweet potatoe hash browns- the only bit of that menu that made it to the plate was....brown (and a lot of hash- not the bad kind!!!) !!! I need help!!! i mean well- i just cant cook!!

[Stupot]

See:

http://tinyurl.com/7pv9kam

[tinseltoes]

even the dog wont eat it- im so bad- my intentions are good- but the food turns out so horrendous...where am i going wrong!!!

[pedoja]

Try something simple like a hot pot.... you can't really go wrong with that unless you don't cook it for long enough.

[whiplash]

Try something simple like a hot pot.... you can't really go wrong with that unless you don't cook it for long enough.

With some nice fresh crusty bread.

[shorty_rambo]

I stick to really really easy things, like spag bol, as in mince - pasta and then the sauce out of a jar, or curry, as in - rice,chicken and sauce out of a jar - sensing a pattern here??

Filing that - tesco do a great range of ding ding meals

[tinseltoes]

With some nice fresh crusty bread.

Seriously-its a standing joke!-i dont know the amount of times i have said to the kids- " Im making ........ with some nice crusty bread!" ( As if thats gonna make everything ok!which it does as thats the only nice bit about the meal!) but seriously i say that everytime!!! lol!!!!

[KissThis]

Easy peasy lemon squeezy recipeeeezy!
1 onion
4oz (ish) mushrooms
1 tin of heinz (or any ol' cheap brand) spaghetti
1 tin of cheap corned beef
Cheese (to taste)

method
Chop onion quite small and fry gently in a bit of butter and cooking oil.
Chop mushrooms while onions are frying and then throw into the pan with onions.
Dice corned beef while onions and muggies are gently frying and clod into pan.
Mix gently.
Add tin of spaghetti to the pan, mix and heat through.
Turf the lot into an ovenproof dish (the flatter type is better than the deeper type)
Cover with as much or as little grated cheese as you want, and ether stick it under the grill or in the oven until cheese is bubbly golden.

Nom it with a chunk of well buttered crusty bread.

YUM!

[Stupot]

even the dog wont eat it- im so bad- my intentions are good- but the food turns out so horrendous...where am i going wrong!!!

It's the first time I can recall you ever saying such a thing....

[steftabron]

get a slow cooker. lob raw chunks of meat and chopped up carrots, tatties etc etc in and it tells u how much gravy in the destruction book ( i think) or someone else on here will i am sure, turn it on and leave. 6-7 hours later - steaming hot meal.

i only know this cos my mate does it for her and her family b 4 she goes to work so it's done when home.

i got a George Foreman last week I'll let you know how that goes

xxxx we can't be good at EVERYTHING!!!

edit. forgot to say TIGER bread nomnomnomnomnom

[BarbaraR]

Hi - why not buy a slow cooker?

You can't go wrong and you can buy packet mixes to bring out the flavours from Morrison's / Tesco etc . .

[tinseltoes]

even the slow cooker thinks im milleniums behind!!! Heston- i need you now!!! x x x x

[cally800]

get a slow cooker. lob raw chunks of meat and chopped up carrots, tatties etc etc in and it tells u how much gravy in the destruction book ( i think) or someone else on here will i am sure, turn it on and leave. 6-7 hours later - steaming hot meal.

i only know this cos my mate does it for her and her family b 4 she goes to work so it's done when home.

i got a George Foreman last week I'll let you know how that goes

xxxx we can't be good at EVERYTHING!!!

edit. forgot to say TIGER bread nomnomnomnomnom

it's giraffe bread now, Stef...

[*concerned*]

Tesco - a ready meal of their Bubble & Squeak, £2 I think it is, plus a tin of corned beef = probably the best corned beef hash you have ever tasted.

(You do know how to make corned beef hash don't you ?)

[silver fox]

TT
Just to cheer you up, when my best mate got married he didn't know that his new lovely wife had pretty meagre cooking skills.

I would hazard a guess that even in your worst moments you have never tried cooking a turnip whole, or frying eggs in the shells, or piece de resistance popping one of those horrible tinned pies into the oven without removing the lid, I believe the resulting explosion was quite awesome.

Amazingly she is now a not bad cook, mind you they have been married for
45 years.

[tinseltoes]

thanks for the vote of confidence!!! x x x

[den]

Forget the sauces in jars and packets (and the slow cooker. I can cook, but our slow cooker ruined everything I did and soon went to the tip). They are uniformly vile and are full of hideous additives and salt.

The best tip I can give, and I know it's a cliché, but it works, is to get Delia's original Cookery Course book (from 7.33 on Amazon) and follow any recipe you choose to the letter. Yes, she is boring, but her recipes work every time and, after a while, using them familiarises you with the way ingredients go together and how things should look and smell at various stages in the cooking process. You will learn to cook almost by osmosis.

[sallycinnamon]

Don't be too ambitious at first, try stews and hotpots rather than making separate items to make a meal, which can get complicated.

Here's an easy one we have all the time and there really is no skill involved:

Fry a little oil and butter in a pan, add chopped onion and fry for a few minutes. Add 2 tablespoons tomato puree, 1/2 pint beef stock (you can even buy ready made stock at tesco) 800g stewing steak (roll in seasoned flour first) 1/2 bottle red wine, few bay leaves and chopped carrots and parsnips, plus loads of small new potatoes. Bring to the boil then transfer to a casserole dish with a lid on and cook at about 160 for 4-5 hours. To check if ready take a small piece of meat out and see if it falls apart without having to cut it. So easy and really tasty.

[sallycinnamon]

Another winter one that is easy:

Baked some large potatoes in the oven, when done remove, cut in half and remove all of the potato from the skin. Mix the potato with sweetcorn and chopped garlic sausage plus a few drops of tabasco sauce, refill the skins with the mix and top with loads of grated cheese - cook for about 20-30 mins.

Bit more interesting than baked spuds, and go nicely with gammon, or even steak or a plain chicken breast.

[sallycinnamon]

... and you can serve crusty bread with the stew...

[Delbertious]

Oh you said bad cook! misread that lol

[Albion102]

Don't be too ambitious at first, try stews and hotpots rather than making separate items to make a meal, which can get complicated.

Here's an easy one we have all the time and there really is no skill involved:

Fry a little oil and butter in a pan, add chopped onion and fry for a few minutes. Add 2 tablespoons tomato puree, 1/2 pint beef stock (you can even buy ready made stock at tesco) 800g stewing steak (roll in seasoned flour first) 1/2 bottle red wine, few bay leaves and chopped carrots and parsnips, plus loads of small new potatoes. Bring to the boil then transfer to a casserole dish with a lid on and cook at about 160 for 4-5 hours. To check if ready take a small piece of meat out and see if it falls apart without having to cut it. So easy and really tasty.

Sally - that sounds like a recipe for a casserole full of mush. I would not put the veggies in till the last hour (add them raw and then bring to the boil on hob and put back in oven).

[Topsy42]

even the slow cooker thinks im milleniums behind!!! Heston- i need you now!!! x x x x

Don't be pretending you can't cook just so Heston will come to you , we all know what you're playing at


Wouldn't say no to Jamie Oliver myself.

[Topsy42]

Seriously-its a standing joke!-i dont know the amount of times i have said to the kids- " Im making ........ with some nice crusty bread!" ( As if thats gonna make everything ok!which it does as thats the only nice bit about the meal!) but seriously i say that everytime!!! lol!!!!

Just make a big pan of soup for today...with some nice crusty bread.

Tomorrow get the barbie out.

[mick the miller]

Since my wife passed away, I have realized what a good cook she was.
With the help of my daughter I have learned to cook. bake my own bread, and most is home made.
Get your children to help if they are old enough , they usually eat what the have made themselves.
THE internet is full of helpful advice and easy recipies, I use it all the time.
Nothing like your own spag bol ,beats anything out of a jar,.

[Mr H]

Sally - that sounds like a recipe for a casserole full of mush. I would not put the veggies in till the last hour (add them raw and then bring to the boil on hob and put back in oven).

It sounds like sloppy stew, which is awesome. The only thing I don't put in until nearer the end is the tinned potatoes.

[tougholdbird]

Drain a tin of tuna; put in an oven-proof dish; mix in a tin of condensed mushroom soup and then put mashed potato on top of the tuna/mushroom mix; grate cheese on top and put in the oven until the cheese has melted.
So easy and so tasty! Don't forget the crusty bread

[Justlookin]

It sounds like sloppy stew, which is awesome. The only thing I don't put in until nearer the end is the tinned potatoes.

Yeah it is really tasty, I made it last week and the dog loved it

[Stupot]

Drain a tin of tuna; put in an oven-proof dish; mix in a tin of condensed mushroom soup and then put mashed potato on top of the tuna/mushroom mix; grate cheese on top and put in the oven until the cheese has melted.
So easy and so tasty! Don't forget the crusty bread

Exactly the way it's been done here over many years (small tin of Campbell's condensed soup)...

[mick the miller]

From the sound of some people on this thread ,God bless you bellies.
Cookings not hard ,if I can do it anybody can,I even enjoy it.
For a women to say she can,t cook is deplorable, she should learn, in between raising the kids ,washing his clothes,( he,s got to look smart when he goes down the pub to meet his little bit on the side).
Decorate the house, fix the roof, service the car, and pay the bills of course.
And when you done with that I am sure us men can find you some more to do..